'Brazil and the Art of Passion'

Yesterday, rehearsal went fantastic. It was one of those days when I realized why I do this. I've memorized and blocked 16 pages. I'm still stumbling on parts of the text, but I have almost thirty-five minutes of the show up and blocked. I'm still re-writing, staying several pages ahead before so that I'm not re-memorizing, but I really like working like this. I think with theatre, if you can do it, its the only way to work. Rehearsals inform the writing in a way you cannot have just using your imagination. Anther rule I loosely apply: If there is a part that isn't working the first or second time you try to stand it up, it will probably be some of the best writing in the text. When you start to innovate and 'reach', you begin to find elements of the writing that seemed hidden at first. I'm not talking about 'flowery' language in the writing, I'm talking about nuts and bolts, or writing that seems 'unwanted' in the text. Its the 'breakthrough' writing, or the writing that deeply connects to something in you that is difficult to say. Yesterday, I went in an hour early and worked on line read throughs to find the trouble spots, and then came back to the apartment to pick up Kurt for the longer part of the rehearsal. One clue to knowing I was going to have a great rehearsal is that I didn't want to go in. I resisted all morning as I did the re-writing, I had to force myself to get in the truck and travel down to the theatre. Its the 'faith opposing feelings' dilemma. The discipline dilemma. I've learned that most of the time, anything that 'taxes' you hard does not come with a boat load of feelings, in fact most of the time your feelings will try to take you in a different direction. Thus faith becomes an important function of action. Action without feelings, believing that the feelings will come if you 'take action'. The old 'get to the mountain' first routine. 

We arrived home at 7:00p yesterday evening with a message from Scott that he was going to The First Brazilian Film Festival at the old Egyptian theatre in Hollywood. Again, the last thing I wanted to do was go to a film festival after a grueling rehearsal day. I am SO glad I did! It was a wonderful evening, (and free!) we missed the red carpet part, but got there and inside early enough to see the 'kick-off' movie, 'Romance', which was an amazing movie. As fate would direct, it was a movie about theatre, film, and television, but mostly about being an artist. It was so beautifully done! Latin cultures can delve into 'love' without ever sounding pretentious, there was so much emotion in this movie! And it was about love and passion! It was a great reminder of finding those feelings that are somewhere in all of us, the ones that we either buried or forgot about. Find the romance! Find the love and let it explode! It was a beautifully rendered film, and of course the festival was filled with Brazilians, which I have not been around to much. Wow, what a beautiful culture! There is something powerful about the way they approach life and being in a social situation like that.  All the beverages and wonderful food was in abundance and offered up in large quantities, I didn't want to leave! However, today is another long rehearsal day, and so we left before the stroke of midnight. As I was driving home, I found myself thinking about the times in my life when art and passion seemed to be in everything, as much a part of life as eating and drinking. Perhaps that is still there, but so often we forget that food can either be fuel or 'an experience'.  Love can either be an action void of feeling or 'an experience'. A great film, or a great piece of art can resurrect thoughts and feelings within you that may have been dormant. Again, it was a choice of faith, and certainly not feeling that got us to this festival. Once we were there, we didn't have to try and 'work' anything up, it came in a flood. Thank you Brazil! 

Today will be a long day, but I think a good one--after yesterday the electricity seems to be flowing fast, I'll take advantage of it as long as I can. Perhaps yesterday was a turning point in the rehearsal process, and it will continue through the show. There is always a turning point in each show, where you would spend your last ten dollars on paint, because there is a passion that goes beyond what you believe you are capable of. As the budget for the show subsides, and the money dwindles into a thousand unforseen practicalities, you live with the art, and that has to be enough...

'Twenty-Eight Days'

Today was a day off from the theatre except for an hour or so memory work that I have to do tonight.  Kurt was able to get Lakers tickets from his brother, so we went to The Staples Center and watched the Spurs get rocked by the Lakers. I have never been in the Laker's house, so it was fun to feel the live energy there. 

After we arrived home, I went to a place called 'Crane's', where they were having 'Aussie Day', that's all the Australians together in a bar getting really drunk and playing music really loud. I listened to my friend, Carla Werner play, and then left. Australians are fun loving and friendly people, with a great soul. The live musicians played lots of Australian music, so everyone was singing and having a great time. It was great just to listen to all of those Australian accents for awhile. Its also really interesting that they have such a vibrant underground, I guess its like any of the cultures here, they know and support each other. 

The play is coming right along. I'm finding it to be really hard work though, we've been rehearsing four to five hours a day, (not including the memory work I'm doing before and after). The logic would be that since you wrote the material, it will be easier to memorize. That is not the case, its like any memorization, long hours and lots of repetition. We're also still making cuts and switching things around, which is really fatiguing sometimes, but it has to be done. It is really amazing though, what begins to happen with the script. As you re-work and re-work, the script begins to get distilled down to its essence. Getting it to where it all belongs in the story you have to tell is the motive.  As I said before, there are pages of writing that was really  very good that gets cut. I have a 'Bohemian Cowboy Remnants File' which is where 'cuts' go. Its nineteen pages of cuts right now, and there will be more. Some of that material may get used for other plays or other kinds of writing, but if you imagine nineteen pages out of the forty-five pages the play originally was, its quite a chunk. Because I want the show to run ninety minutes, I have to work in new material with the cuts, but with material that keeps the narrative where I want it. It is grueling right now, so every day has to count in some way--ironically, twenty-eight days until opening--the same about of time one would spend in a month's rehab. I will go through a total transformation in these next twenty-eight days. Physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. I think I told you I'm back on my walking and working out schedule, only now its four to six miles a day, and an hour of weight work. By the way, it takes me an hour and forty-five minutes to do six miles. I hope to be ten or so pounds lighter by opening. 

On the production front, Scott found a projector on line for two hundred and fifty dollars, which we will need for one of the sections of the play. The set design is also changing each day, last night Kurt sent the script and design ideas to his cousin Lance at The University of Delaware, (he's an artist and designer) to get his input. There's talk of him painting us a design, or at least creating a model. We have the acting spaces pretty well set, however, which facilitates the blocking or the 'composition of movement' of the play.  If walls do end up moving, it won't be that hard for me to make a few changes. Although there is lots to be done, after lots of years of doing this, I'm really trusting in the process of the production. The trick is to not lay in bed and 'freak out' by everything that is not done. Rather, you must be emboldened by the progress you are making, and trust in the energy that will come 'down the wire'. When doing a play, the last couple of weeks tend to get what I call 'wall to wall', but there is a special energy that manifests when you are almost there. There is a point in any production when you begin to feel what you have--Saturday, after we warmed up, and I went through the first twelve page run, I felt like we really have something special. Of course, the hopeful plight of believing in what you have must be present to do this kind of work, but this show does feel special. It feels transitional, not only of my life, but of my work. A new kind of work is emerging. 

As the bank account dwindles down, I feel a lot the excitement that a gambler must feel, right before he bets on a race that looks like long odds, but he has some inside information that know one else knows about. It's not a sure thing, (nothing is) but the odds on the board, and the odds in his heart are very much in opposition. The odds will increase as you buy your tickets... 

plays411.com/bohemiancowboy

'The First 'Real' Rehearsal'

What a difference a day makes. Today, we really went to work on the rehearsal. Here's a play by play. To seriously begin the rehearsal process, the general set design has to be formulated, so that when we do the blocking, we are using all the proper entrances and 'acting spaces'. So, to get to it, Kurt and I had to come to a general agreement on the design. This was a little stressful, because we had somewhat different ideas on the design. If this had been a bigger play, we probably would have hired a set designer, but since its just he and I, and we both have design experience, its easier to cut out another middle man and do it ourselves. So, after making drawings and talking for a couple of hours, we were ready to start on the acting spaces and the furniture pieces. In a one person show, its essential that there are plenty of 'acting spaces' to employ, so that there are plenty of options.  Once the furniture pieces were set, we were ready to really set the 'first moment'. The first moment (in reality the first maybe, ten seconds)  is essential to have perfectly set, because the rest of the play is a spontaneous reaction to those very first few seconds of the play. Now that the play has been re-worked and re-written, and cut and pasted, and rolled around, I divide it into all the 'beats'. Each of these beats or short scenes have titles that suggest the theme of the beat. For example the second beat is called Beat #2 'Singer of Songs'. Most of the beats are fairly short, the longer pieces that are of one general subject are still divided, even though the subject matter may be collective. For me, as the writer it helps me organize my material, but for the acting portion of the show, it gives me a chronological order that I can remember in sequence. So, along with learning the lines, I am also memorizing the order of the 'pieces'. We were able to work through the first ten beats today, or seven pages. Each page represents between ninety seconds and two minutes. So we blocked the first fifteen minutes of the show. I hope this math makes sense. For those of you who like to break down structure, this is why a play has a certain precision to it. This whole process took five hours. It was a good day, a good rehearsal. 

I didn't mention that the rehearsal didn't start until one o'clock in the afternoon, so from nine to around noon, there was more re-writing on the script. Because the first eighteen pages are now set for rehearsals, I can work beyond that and still make changes until we get to that point, when I'll have to 'set the text' and only make minor changes. Does that make sense? I've had people tell me recently how nervous this makes them that I am rehearsing and still working on the script. However, its fairly common when working on a new play to work right up to the day of the preview. There is a great book called 'ACT ONE' by Moss Hart,  a wonderful book on the process of creating theatre. Imagine opening a play on a Friday night, re-writing the second act all night after the performance, starting rehearsals the next morning to make the changes in the second act for that night's (Saturday) performance. That's the way it used to get done folks. Actors would have to memorize sometimes entire scenes before the next night. That is 'old school', but it is mind boggling to think about. We will be making changes to the text I'm sure even during the show from weekend to weekend.  It's wonderful to be able to just focus on this kind of work. I'm very lucky to be able to do this all day without having to work another job. 

After rehearsal, we came home for a snack and then it was off to the gym for a cardio and light weight workout. This lasted two hours, and then it was home for a light meal, some news on the Obama presidency, writing the blog and finally, going to bed. 

It was extremely gratifying to finally have some things set. Things will go up rather quickly now, once the general blocking is done we will start on the polish. I can't wait. Its on, ladies and gentlemen, this is going to be a great show, I hope you can see it! Good night! 

'Wrestling With Words and Deeds'

Today is a big day. January 20th. The day of the beginning of Obama's presidency, and thirty days until I open this show. In the grand scheme of things, obviously one is just a little more important, still, its time to turn the burner up to medium high for those of you who are cooking on a gas stove. It might seem a little frightening (and it is) to think I am still working on the script, (and I am) but I'm also rehearsing and memorizing what is already solid. In  my experience, its why when you go see a production, (especially a community theatre production) the first act always seems to be more polished than the second act. Its because it usually gets rehearsed more. I can remember being in shows that were 'off' on the rehearsal process, and blocking the final scenes the week of the show. This means they are going to get far less 'run through' time than everything else. I will try to not let that happen, but there will definitely be parts that will 'go down the wire'. Today, I have to have a big writing day. This is a warm up. Somedays, (like yesterday) I started what I call 'chasing the rabbit'.  I got on a tangent in the script where I was trying to find a Shakespearean reference to all seven of the movements in the play. It was the wrong move (for right now) and I wound up spending four or five hours 'chasing the rabbit', and when I was through, I had created a whole new set of problems. I ended up taking everything back out again. When things like that happen, its easy to get frustrated, still, it will probably yield something somewhere down the line. 

After working on and off most of the day, I indulged in going to a movie last night at 11:00p. I am so glad I did. If you haven't seen 'The Wrestler', I would definitely go and see it soon. Of course I am a sucker for any comeback story, and well, its not really a comeback story, more of an intense character study.  If you have followed Mickey Rourke's life as I have done, it was a wonderful parallel of 'life imitating art'. Mickey plays Randy 'The Ram', a wrestler who is getting up in years, (he wears both a hearing aid and glasses) and is facing the end of his career as a wrestler. I won't tell you much more, but I will say that it is one of those movies that stays with you. There is lots to ponder in this very well done film by Darren Aronofsky. Wow. I found myself feeling a little like 'The Ram', getting back in the ring for another round of theatre. It was both inspiring and heartbreaking. For anyone wanting 'one more go' at anything in life, it is well worth seeing this movie. If nothing else, Mickey Rourke's face has become a landscape that is well worth watching. 

I've finally been able to resume my walking routine this past week, which takes a little out of me energy wise it seems, but I know it will eventually give it back. I walked through the neighbor hoods of Los Feliz and East Hollywood yesterday early evening, where the large affluent houses are a plenty. There are so many of these houses, (beautiful and old) I kept thinking, "What do these people do to get a house like this?"  I'll bet a good percentage of them work in the 'entertainment industry', which, duh, makes sense. Yesterday, Kurt was also able to get Scott and I memberships to Crunch Gym, so we start our light workouts tonight. Everything right now is focussed and directed towards two things. The first is getting the play up. The second is getting the next job. The play is in motion, and no matter what feelings of 'fight or flight' come up, there is no turning around on that one. If any of you ever want to finish a play, just give yourself a production date and sign a contract for the space, believe me, you will finish. In fact, Its much of the advice I give playwrights wanting to know how to get a play up on its feet. Pick a year. Pick a day. The second part of the motive equation, finding the next job is a little tougher, but we are confident that we will have that by the time the play goes up. We are working several different angles. I'll save those angles for the next entry. 

Its time for me to get to work on the play. Kurt has recommended several more 'cuts', which is always tough, because you get very protective of certain parts of the story you have created. I remember Gus Edwards, (my playwriting teacher) used to say,  "If you are to attached to a part of your writing, it probably has to go..." Whenever there is a particular 'flowery' or especially emotional part, I always try to look at it objectively. It probably has to go. There have been several 'chunks' that have had to go the last week or so, but the play is definitely getting a very tight structure. Happy Inauguration day everyone, the beginning of a new era. 

Panic and Curves

It seems like forever since I've written an entry. This last week has been filled with both joy and panic, with an extra dose of the 'panic' component. I had obsessed so much on the opening of the play, that I wrote this entire preamble that explained everything. When I stood up to work it in rehearsal, I quickly surmised that it was totally wrong, even though I'd spent about a week on it. As I was standing there speaking the words, I went through that anxiety that most performers go through, "What if I can't do this? What if this doesn't work? What if I die on stage?" Something like that. This, however, is usually a turning point in finally getting to the raw core of the work. For the past two days, I've been writing, for a couple of hours, then taking a thirty minute nap, then writing, then writing, having a snack, writing... you get the picture. BUSY. Only four weeks away, and I have twenty pages of monologue to still memorize. I could only memorize what I felt was finished, but I'm finally getting there. The monologue that the character speaks to his mother has been written every which way but Sunday, finally, yesterday, the monologue came out right. I've written five different monologues before I found the right tone. Then there was trouble with the overall structure of the piece. I realized that when I did the reading in Utah, that I could really read and write and take the piece anywhere I wanted to go. When something is new, it will generally always play in the first reading, because there is something fresh that will carry it. In a show, however, that doesn't fly. EVERYTHING needs to work. Tonight, I finally have some relief because I really think that progress has been made. Even though I do freak a little about the performance part of things, its the material that ultimately freaks me out. It has to be good. It has to work. It has to be 'tight'. So, there you have the 'work' report. 

On the Hollywood front, I'm liking this place more and more as each day passes. I wouldn't be surprised if this becomes my winter base. Of course, I'll have to figure out how to finance, but I think great things are about to happen. I have a great deal of faith in the energy that is coming my way right now. Kurt has been here about a week, and of course with him comes another powerful surge of energy. He has meetings set up, ideas galore, and keeps us all working in a very healthy way. He's great to have here. Scott has been working with a post-production movie guy, so he's on a learning curve. We are all on THE MASSIVE LEARNING CURVE. 

Hopefully, I'll be able to report, (sorry Cheryl) a little more frequently this week. With Kurt's arrival, the concentration has definitely changed. The focus has been completely directed towards the play. Buy your tickets. We will deliver. Come to L.A., even for a short trip. We are in the 'thick of it'. Its exciting! 

Kurt Arrives

Kurt arrived last night on the train, today we start rehearsals as a unit. The past several days have been a whirlwind. Along with an unusual heat wave, there has been much to do. Saturday, however, I worked here at the apartment and watched the Arizona Cardinals beat the Carolina Panthers. It was quite the game. I'm looking forward to this weekend's game, and hopefully, another Cardinals win. 

Sunday, it was in the low eighties, so Scott and his friend Kaori and I, hit Zuma beach for the afternoon. It was a perfect beach day, not to crowded, and lots of sun. We drove home through Malibu Canyon and picked up some barbells I left at Kent's. Monday and Tuesday, I worked here at the apartment and prepared for the rehearsals this week. Although I haven't been depressed, I've been a little down, I think because I need to get some momentum for this project going again. The post cards are supposed to arrive today, and so will begin the promotion and gathering an audience. Of course, it is going to be a challenge to get people to come to see one person performing on stage. In five weeks, we will see how well we have done. I'm glad Kurt has finally arrived, still, its another set of circumstances and a new change. His will be positive, as he brings lots of energy that I am needing right now. I'll try to write more this evening. I'll do a short walk before rehearsal, and hopefully this will begin a new series of walks. (I still haven't found my walk pattern at this new location) Oh, once again, Scott came through with a practically brand new futon for, yep, you guessed it, FREE! 

'Returning From Exile'

It's five o'clock in the morning--I can't sleep so I thought I would write for awhile. We started rehearsals yesterday evening, and I think I'm just over stimulated, exhausted, and excited all at once. It felt good to be back in a theatre, which for me is like a pastor in exile going back to a church. Its the one place I feel very comfortable, and because there are four theatres in the complex, there were plenty of actors and theatre artists around (the actors are always out on the sidewalk smoking). There was an audition going on, so the theatre was abuzz. I'm rehearsing in a nice size little theatre space, with plenty of tables, chairs and light. The theatre is right on Santa Monica Blvd., outside there is a steady flow of traffic, of course here, no matter the time of day there is a steady flow of traffic... I came into the space with some coffee, my guitar, and my trusty black bag that holds all the words. I've taken up using a composition book for taking notes and writing songs. Adjusting the script I use my computer. I took in fifteen pages to work tonight. 

I found getting started a very emotional experience for me. Not only had I been preparing for that moment, but the material is still a little devastating. Still, I love this process. I pulled out my guitar for a tuning, and just played songs for about an hour to warm up. Next, I take the script out and put it on a music stand, so that I can move around while I memorize. I'm pretty familiar with the first fifteen pages, so its moving away, speaking the words, finding redundancy, and making little changes as I re-memorize. After I worked like this for a couple of hours, I wrote a new song. As always, the song always seems beautiful when I first write it, we'll see tomorrow if its any good. I worked a good four and a half hours, and then came home. Its good having Scott here, we have found an easy working ethic, and like me, he can work the long hours it takes to get deadlines. We finalized the post cards and the image, and while I was rehearsing Scott ordered a thousand of them. He also had a beautiful poster when I got home, and with him here, I don't feel so lonely. 

Scott and I have been reading out of 'Conversations With God' in the mornings since he has been here, a book I discovered on the shelf of the former tenant. Its a great book, and has some really fascinating ideas about spirituality. I think I like it because rather than pontificate things I've heard and read all my life, it is a dialogue, which I can certainly relate to. This morning it was talking about thoughts becoming words, and words becoming deeds. I think that sums it up. Scott is a 'doer' like I am, and this book is a good one for us to read together right now. Its rather startling to read things like, "Why do you think you have this book in your hand right now?" I'm impressed with Scott getting up and running each morning since he's been here. He found a bed on Craig's list for free, which we went and picked up. Its a practically new bed, I couldn't believe it was free! Scott is getting things done. It was Scott who took the wonderful photo for the post card as I've previously attested to. We are already getting great feedback on the post card. We talked this evening about how important the quality is of each element of the production. This is what will set you apart. Our post card and image will set us apart from most, I think. 

I think I can almost sleep now, but lastly, I wanted to let you know that our website is up and running for ticket sales. Where ever you are now, you can look at the arrangements for the shows, and pick one that you like if you are coming here to see it. I will keep reminding people that they can now buy the tickets online. Some people like to plan way ahead, and this allows you to do so. The tickets are fifteen dollars if you buy ahead, and eighteen on the day of the show. Plays 411 is the ticket broker, and they take a portion of the sales for providing the service. www.plays411.com/bohemiancowboy. I can't figure out how to link it here yet, so you may have to play around searching for it, but I will figure it out. Its kind of cool to go there, though. 

I've changed the rehearsal times with David Fofi to 1:00 in the afternoon now that we are not doing the other play. This will be amazingly helpful, except I have a six hour rehearsal block contracted, I'm going to get lots of rehearsal! Good night, er, good morning. I realize I owe so many of you a response. Please don't take it personally if I haven't gotten back to you, its an energy thing right now, once all this pre-production tasking is done, I will have a little more time to respond and thank you for your kind comments, and believe me, they are lending lots of support! 

'Photo Shoot and Curtains'

Scott and I have been working the last two days virtually without stopping. Monday, we went into downtown Los Angeles and shot over two hundred photos. We walked the streets, stood next to buildings, scouted locations, and finally, 'got our shot'. This took all morning and afternoon. Then, we downloaded the pictures and narrowed down to three. Finally, we selected this photo I'm posting at the top of the blog. This morning, we got up and began to work on the graphic art and the 'copy' for the post card, which is almost done! While Scott was 'photo shopping' the photo, I was generating the copy, registering our play with Plays 411 to facilitate ticket sales, and writing the new press release. 

Downtown Los Angeles is really amazing! I didn't realize the vibrant pedestrian culture there. When you are in the deepest part of it, you would not know it from Midtown Manhattan. We hit Los Angeles Street, Broadway, (the old theatres and hotels are really cool), The L.A. Arts District, The Fashion District, (get an italian suit for $39), and finally the Fabric District, where we 'haggled' nine yards of fabric. We got lots of looks, smiles, and conversation via Scott with camera, and me 'cowboyed up' with guitar and bag. It was a near perfect day, and as I said, we 'got our shot'. 

Plays 411 is an organization here in Los Angeles that provides theatre services. We are using the organization for two primary purposes. First, as I mentioned, we are using their wonderful ticket sales organization. By tomorrow evening, you will be able to purchase your tickets for 'Bohemian Cowboy'. You will be able to do this with a telephone call or on the website they will create for us. I will write when I have that information. Secondly, we are using their public relations department to facilitate all of the media contacts. They take the press release I've written, edit it, create a press packet, and then send to all the media outlets to get us listed in all the newspapers.  I also decided to do an extra bit of PR, by having them also do a follow-up as we get closer to the show. I am on a new learning curve here, and it is exciting. I'm learning so much! 

The nine yards of cloth we 'haggled' for was to cover our cold windows. I showed Scott my theatre technique of making curtains quickly and theatrically, (I've done this so many times an hour before the opening of a show!) I won't tell you exactly how its done, but it does involve duct tape. We covered the biggest windows last night, tonight we will cover the rest of them. It has been rather cool down here, so its good to get the windows covered, you would not know these curtains were not 'the real thing'. 

A word about the photo we selected. The photo is perfectly symbolic for the show. The cowboy on the move across another street, alone with his belongings and guitar. His walk is direct and determined. The people walking towards him are the audience. The street sign (you can't see in the smaller photo, is Los Angeles Street), and finally, the most obvious blue sky against a cepia structure, where he is headed. I wanted the direct blue of the sky to look like the sky in Boulder, Utah, surreal and deeply beautiful. It is the only color in the photo.  There is more symbolism, but I wanted to tell you some of the discussion between Scott and I as we decided on this one. It is alive! Feel free to find your own interpretation of the photo. I would love it! 

Tomorrow, I will get to the theatre at 5:00 p.m. to start rehearsals. Even though Kurt (the director) will not be here until next week, I will begin a general 'blocking' of the first couple of movements. I will also begin to play through all of the songs, and to create a couple of new ones. It won't be long! 

'Last Remnants of Kerouac'

The New Year starts with a little bit of depression today--I may be doing a show called 'Bohemian Cowboy', but each new move is always an adjustment. I do like the new digs, but sleeping is always an issue for about a week or so. So last night, I couldn't sleep and so I finished the Kerouac book--I think reading a book like that, and the dramatic ending of the drunkard's death really put me in a funk. Then, the New Year is always a big build up that forces you to challenge the upcoming year. I'm excited to get to the rehearsals, (I start on Wednesday), and I'm sure it will dramatically change my direction, which will be a good thing. Cousin Scott has been 'hanging out' with me, and I think he will be a great asset for the show--he has that youthful energy--he gets things done like so many in our family, so I am glad he is on board, and glad that there is family around. 

I think the striking thing about Kerouac is his willingness to be both vulnerable and honest, it is hard to tell, however, whether the majority of  his honesty came from the drink. I did detect though, long periods when he 'got to the writing', there was much  honesty in the writing. I think he was so damaged by critics, so many writers have that vulnerability that creates such angst in not being accepted. I have had my own detractors,  (as most writers do) Ginsberg says towards the end of the book, "No one really understood what he was doing..." Alcoholics who cannot quit all face the same end--and it is tragic. Kerouac died the classic drunk's death, a hemorrhage of the esophagus. Blake said, "I was walking among the fires of hell, delighted with the enjoyments of genius which to angels look like torment and insanity." If ever there was a writer who saw so much of it, it had to be Kerouac.  I used to say that "being an alcoholic is one of the hardest jobs there is..." Most would not see it as a job, but drunk or sober, it takes a daily maintenance of relentlessness, to keep either one alive.  So, I am off to Border's today to get another book, but really, the book was as exhaustive of any biography I've ever read. The other biography I loved was 'Shakey', which was Neil Young's biography. Kerouac always kept a copy of Boswell's  biography of 'Samuel Johnson' near him when he wrote. 

This week is an important week in maintaining the discipline. There is an image to create, (Scott and I are doing a photo shoot tomorrow) I've decided on the image I want--I'll put on my cowboy duds and grab a suitcase, we'll got a back shot of me waiting on the corner of the old flea bag hotel, The San Moritz on Sunset Blvd. I appreciate the images I've received from several of you so far, and I may use something of them somewhere, we'll wait until we have the photos tomorrow. Then there is the press release to do, the media list to find, and an assorted array of other tasks that need to be done. I have a six hour rehearsal block Wednesday through Sunday, (when I signed the contract it was for both plays) so, I will definitely get plenty of rehearsal. 

I hope your New Year is good one. I suppose with the new leader coming to us on the twentieth of this month,  we are all hoping for changes.